My name is John Smith. I grew up in between Botwood Newfoundland and Toronto, Ontario. There was a lot of hate and confusion there as my mom was raising us to the best of her ability while my dad worked in Ontario I could never figure out why my dad was never around all I wanted was to have a dad around to do the dad things like play ball, go to the park etc….but they told me had to stay in Ontario to work. Now there was also a lot of good my mom took us to church every Sunday and she rarely missed and that I found out later in life that was the best thing that could ever of happened to me, you see it is true what the bible says train up a child in the way he/she should go and when they are older they will not depart from it. My mother did her best to instill us with good values and did an awesome job doing so. For the first few years of my life I was a quiet kid who stayed out of trouble. You see at one point both my parent's were ministers/preachers of the gospel. But at an early age I started to hang out with the wrong type of kids and I listened to the wrong people.

This is my Testimony: (Short Version)

As I said earlier I grew up going to church every Sunday so you think my life would be a good one, well things were pretty good until I reached the age of twelve; I was a pretty ordinary shy little guy who use to get into the normal amount of trouble. But then one day at the age of twelve everything changed for me, while I was on my way home from school on October 8, 1978 my world as I knew it changed forever. I was hurrying home from school as a matter of fact I was running up the stairs on back of my school as this was a special day it was my Mothers birthday and we were going to take her out for dinner that day.

As I was running up the stairs 3 long flights to go up, I reached the 1st flight and I saw these guys coming down the stairs I never paid no attention to this as this was a school yard so I continued on my way home up the stairs but as they were passing on the second flight out of nowhere one of the guys reached over and grabbed me by my arm threw me back against the railing and started to punch my face.

He never hit another part of my body just my face my eyes were closing fast and I was freaking out as I did not know what was happening or why. He continued to hit me until I could not open my eyes at all, my eyes were so swollen I could not see a thing except blood.

They left as fast as they came by this time other students were coming up the stairs as I was the first one out and got a good head start, I really was excited to be taking my mom out for her birthday. The other students quickly got to where I was and helped me back down the stairs to the school office where the police and my parents were called. This was the beginning of a nightmare. This was the beginning of many years of anguish.

Shortly after the attack my nerves went I could not be left alone I would wake up screaming at night all I could see was those guys in front of me. I put my parents through hell and back with the nightmares I was having and with my nerves starting to fail me I ended up in hospital & counseling.

I lost all interest in school I would just go and skip classes never wanted to be there, I remember on my 16th birthday the truancy officer knocking on my door and I told them I quit, this of course after being suspended many times and almost kicked out of school.

Because of all I was going through with my nerves I lost touch with the real world and having no one I thought who cared or I could turn to I found the wrong type of friends and I started to use drugs to ease the pain and soon I found out I was making friends and loved the attention, I started to go to parties, trying to find something to give me peace. I remember I would go to a party they would give me a beer I hated the taste of it so would just dump it down the sink and fill the bottle with water, but you know I realized soon I was being accepted because I had a bottle in my hand a cigarette in my mouth and was doing drugs with the crowd. I liked this feeling of being accepted and having friends soon I became the party favorite. At first it was ok just a little here and there but soon my drug habit worsened and I started getting into trouble.

I was enjoying the feeling the drugs were giving me it would take away the nightmares and gave me a good feeling. As time passed I met a girl who later became my wife one day while sitting in our apartment with friends doing our usual smoking drugs one of my friends pulled out this bag with a white looking weird stuff inside of it they dumped it on the table pulled out some pipes and started to smoke this stuff. It looked like white stones to me. Then they said here Smitty try some, I said what is it?

They told me Crack I had heard about this drug and was told it was something to stay away from, but they looked like they were having such a good high, they told me don't worry you can't get hooked on it just trying it. So after a while I gave in and tried it and that was the beginning of many years of HELL!!!

I became hooked immediately; my life changed drastically, now if you asked me if I was hooked the answer would have been no way I was having such a good time. The lifestyle was there money, friends, I used and I soon began dealing. But after a while doing this living the life I could tell you so many things that happened, but the bottom line is I lost control and after a while I started stealing and robbing - doing anything I could to relieve the sickness and pain the drugs put on me. No matter whom I hurt or who got in my way I had to have my drugs, I was hooked and on my way to HELL. CRACK COCAINE I call the Devil's Drug.

Finally after many years of a life that took me many places up & down I was arrested in Toronto, Ontario and put into jail. I was almost relieved, thinking I would at least get some help with my drug problem. But I was wrong. I was charged with Armed Robbery and different offences. In October of 1990, I went to prison for the first time in my life. If my life had been bad before, it was really a nightmare now.

The first week that I was in jail I got a call saying I had a visit, it was on a Saturday and I was sick because I was coming off of the drugs and booze. The only person that was coming to see me was my Mother; she never gave up on me no matter what I did to her or what I put her through. She never stopped praying for me or loving me.

I remember they called me on this Saturday and said I had a visit. I went looking for my mother because as I said was the only one I had left and the only one who was coming to see me. To my surprise I found these two people a man and a woman who was there to see me. I said who are you they told me their names. We had our visit and they left but something was different they prayed and said see you again soon. And they came almost every week the whole time I was in jail. There needs to be more people like them that God places a soul upon their heart and they obey God. Because if it was not for them and my Praying Mother I know I would not be here today.

I tried to get off the drugs. For a while, I did okay. But the devil kept whispering, "You can do them just once or even every now and then. It'll be okay." Of course that was a lie, and soon I was using drugs again.

Once I got out of prison I did not stay in Toronto as when I was in prison I met this lady through a pen pal who lived in Halifax so I took off there. I said to myself after all this time in jail I was ok not hooked on CRACK anymore that I was ok. I moved to Halifax once there I thought my life was ok I never did drugs but I drank like crazy little did I realize all I was doing was substituting the alcohol for the drugs, this went on for nearly a year and then one night while out drinking I got drunk and next thing I knew I was right back on the crack. My life went down hill real fast to the point where life was not worth living anymore I started to look at ways to take my life I did not want to live any further in this world I was hurting.

I had enough sense of mind to finally call my Mother, when she picked up the phone I told her I was finished with life I was doing drugs again and could not handle it anymore, my mother as usual told me not to give up but to come HOME. After all I did to my parents she told me to come home. They made arrangements to get me back to Toronto, this was in September 1993. Once in Toronto I stayed with them I was sick from the drugs and alcohol it was on September 26, 1993 when I awoke and decided life could not go on any further I was hurting so bad for drugs and a drink. I decided I would end it all, I remember my Mother getting ready to go to church that evening she had a few friends over to her place and they invited me to come to church there was a special speaker there I would like to hear.

I said no way can I go to church in my condition so my mom went on to church, but then her friend came back and urged me to go with her, I said to myself why not I would not be around much longer as I already had plans made to take my life that evening I would go to church make everyone happy then do what I needed to do, so I went and sat on the side of the church they went through the service and then the Preacher got up to preach it was getting near time to go and I felt different I remember all the times in Sunday School etc… my mom had instilled in me as a boy and I said God if your real you got to clean me up you got to set me free otherwise this is it I am taking my life TONIGHT.

The preacher was preaching and something strange happened. God began to convict me of all the bad things I had done in my life. I realized the pain and suffering I'd been through wouldn't begin to compare with what was ahead of me because I knew if I took my life I was going to HELL but I didn't care because I figured I was in hell already. I knew then that if I didn't make some changes, and make them quickly that if I took my life the torment was only going to start.

I said God I can't do this on my own you got to do this for me you got to do that for me and all of a sudden he spoke to me so clearly and said you want me to do this for you and you want me to do that for you, BUT WHAT ARE YOU WILLING TO DO FOR ME? I said God I will give you my life as that is all I had left to offer him, that was it I felt a load shift.

But I was coming off of all the drugs and booze and my mind was playing tricks on me I thought I was going crazy so I said ok God if this is you and I am not losing my mind, I looked around the church I never knew anyone there except my mother and her friends. I said ok God prove yourself to me so I will know this is you and I am not losing my mind, I looked around and saw a Gray Haired Lady sitting on the other side of the church and I said God you send her to me to confirm this so I know it is you.

I put my head down and before I knew it I felt a tap on my shoulder saying excuse me Sir I don't know who you are but God said this is your night to be set free. I never blinked I got up out of my seat and walked down the stairs to the altar I fell down on my knees and that night, in September 26, 1993, I asked the Lord to forgive me and to come into my life. And He did! He delivered me from drugs and alcohol instantly and he helped me start all over again.

"If any one is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has passed away, behold, the new has come (II Cor. 5:17)."

If you are bound by drugs or alcohol or lost in sin and think there is no way out, believe me, Jesus is the way! He said, "I am the WAY, and the TRUTH and the LIFE… (John 14:6)." Whatever your problem is drugs, alcohol, He is waiting to set you free!

My friend call on Him today, and pray this prayer, as I did there in that church in 1993 He will set you free, if you are sick and tired of being sick and tired and you want change more than anything else in life, simply pray this prayer and you WILL BE SAVED & I BELEIVE SET FREE TODAY..

"Lord Jesus, I am a sinner in need of a Savior. I'm truly sorry for my sins. I believe you are the Son of God, and that you died for me that I might have a new life in you. Please forgive me now, and help me start all over again." Take away my addiction please set me free and give me a new life. Jesus I GIVE you my life today use it for your glory in your name I pray, Amen. Now do just that leave your addiction with the Lord it is no longer yours he said it is cast in the sea of His forgetfulness NEVER to be remembered anymore.

If you mean that with all your heart, you are born again, and Jesus is your Lord.
I'd love to hear from you! Please write me today be sure to include you Name, Address and Phone Number and your e-mail address and tell me what God has set you free from or write me if you just want to talk, I promise to Personally respond to each e-mail.

Send your e-mail to:

john@totallyfreeministries.com

May God Richly Bless you and your Family Today.

John Smith